This post will take us deep deep into the gateway of goodfeels. The polarity of goodfeels and the act of forgiveness may not seem synonymous but the good vibe choice of forgiveness yields to you a freedom that hate, revenge, resentment and anger will not.
One may even go so far as to say that forgiveness is a courageous act of self-respect and empowerment.
To do the invested emotional and mental work that involves having the ability to be able to forgive entirely demonstrates great character, strength of will, compassion and self responsibility. Resistance to forgiveness is to be expected if what we endured was of profound impact against our dignity and rights.
We are beings with an intrinsic wiring and need to feel accepted, worthy and treated with respect and dignity. When people in our lives or even strangers project harmful or disempowering energy at us either through words and/or actions, depending on the esteem of our own self and our habitual way of being and conditioning it can cause you pain, hurt and even suffering.
A therapist once told me that you have to make room for hurt in relationships. This statement resonated with me as I have been both the recipient and perpetrator of misaligned energy.
I have this perception that if everyone is living in unity of their individual heart and mind would need not diminish anyone as a result of being in complete tune with themselves.
The societal structure in which we live in terms of education, yields a mindset of separateness and competition which goes against the intrinsic nature of our species as a collective. The work of your parents or primary caregivers play a pivotal role in how you perceive yourself.
It has been my experience that hurt people, hurt people. Any person who is causing suffering are they themselves, suffering.
The degree of intensity and frequency in which someone demonstrates any kind of disempowering energy gives you a barometer of how unregulated their mental and emotional systems are functioning.
Quantum physics shows us that our lives are a mirror. If you are at peace, your life will yield a peaceful vibe. If you are angry, feeling hateful and vengeful, your energy is still resonating with an energy that was wired into you for survival on the planet, not a regular and consistent way to be in the world. If you have a pattern of being in a state of anger, resentment, hate and irritation, then it would be a good idea to figure out the root of that and how to heal and let that go in your mind and your body Taking an investment of time and knowledge for the simplest and most effective way to do so.
How to forgive someone who is not sorry.
This one is a good topic. It feels irrational to make concessions for poor human behaviour.
The reason for this is that science shows us that our existence is generated from a unified field of energy. A field of energetic resonance that is PURE LOVE. It would make sense then, to see why accepting and pardoning any behaviour or words directed at you that is not in keeping with the vibration of LOVE would feel counter-intuitive.
Sometimes it is not that the person is not sorry, but they are so far down their own rabbit hole of misalignment they may not even be aware that they even have anything to be sorry about. Waiting around for someone to get clear about their own mental health and heart resonance to be able to recognize that their behaviours are proving disempowering for those whom they keep company is a waste of your time and your energy and the pursuit of an endeavour such as this will only cause you more pain and end in disappointment.
It is of imperative importance to nurture yourself. To nurture your needs. To nurture your right to peace and to be treated with LOVE and RESPECT.
When you create boundaries with people about how you expect to be treated and you treat people with the same respect and dignity you expect for yourself, then the act of forgiving comes easily. If you continually accept and allow the disempowering practices of others to harm you and you do not assert your right to peace then you are doing yourself a great disservice to your empowerment and way of being. The emotional quotient and sense of unity that you develop in consciously choosing to be a person who learns enough self-respect and compassion to forgive is an invested gift you bestow upon yourself.
If you can successfully reach a state of “it’s all good” after someone has emotionally, physically, and psychologically abused you on a consistent basis – that is all kinds of a testament to the infinite nature of Love that exists in our beings and proves that no matter whatever happens to you, you have the power of choice and you have the power of presence.
How we define our experiences determines the effects we get out of it. It may very well be that you were abused, victimized and endured trespasses against your humanity you still have the power to heal it all and treat it as an empowering lesson as to what you will and will not accept in your life experience.
It is important that we not dwell on our states of dis empowerment and victimization, nor put the health of our emotional well-being in the hands of other people. They will fail you every time and not because they are bad people, but because they have their own emotional energy to sort out. You, and you alone, are responsible for your emotional well-being.
You have to determine if staying in states of dis empowerment, anger, frustration, sadness and victimization are serving you and your emotional and psychological well-being. I can tell you right now, being human, that these are states that will bring about destruction both internally and externally. This is an ingrained practice that is evident in the underlying structure of our society. To dwell in misery and bring attention to the wrongdoings of others in an attempt to hold them to a higher grade of integrity.
It is a waste of time.
Once you understand – not just in logic, but in experience of feeling and knowing that your state of being, what you think, how you feel and the actions you take, are all creating your life experience and it is solely your job to frame and determine your emotional well-being then no one has the power to hurt you.
Your experiences of hurt, pain and dis empowerment in yourself is mirrored out to you in your life experience. Whether it is a person berating you, or a bird taking a big dump on your new clean suit – quantum physics show that our internal states will yield experiences of like vibration in the external.
It is a delayed reaction, but you reap what you sow. What you do for yourself, you do for another and what you do for another you do for yourself. Don’t take my word for it, just be observational and discerning in your focus and you will see this truth. If you are able to develop a solid practice of stillness or meditation, you will become more aware of yourself and the energy of connection around you.
Presence and self awareness are good tools to cultivate.
In knowing yourself well, you know how to nurture and care for yourself appropriately. A state of peace and love is the state of being indicative of creation.
Forgiveness allows you to access this space in your heart. It is important that no matter how misaligned the deed or deeds that were perpetrated against you not live on in you. The ugliness, the pain, the heaviness – that is not good living. That is all released when you FORGIVE.
If someone is no longer here on this Earth, writing a letter and depositing it near or on the place in which they were laid to rest may offer peace within you.
Forgiveness does not mean that you accept or condone behaviours that have transpired. It means that the occurrence of those events no longer control you emotionally and you have been courageous in acting for your own self care.
Carrying around energy of pain, fear and resentment is bad for your mental and physical health. It basically means that you are allowing yourself to repeatedly be perpetrated emotionally/psychologically by the event(s) that transpired that required your forgiveness in the first place.
The importance of practicing forgiveness is imperative if you want to be able to regulate your emotional and mental processes optimally.
It allows you to live peacefully.
It is a process to do so, but if you have a solid esteem of yourself and an invested interest in your own well-being, then forgiveness is crucial to support good energy in your heart.